First of all, my intention to make this blog is for writing my "love themed" poems. Later on I think it's expanding to other topics like songs, articles and fashion. However, overall it's just about me, my interest and my thoughts. Hope you can find some inspiration and insight from my blog. Feel free to follow my blog and leave a comment on my posts. Happy reading fellas!
I read about this article from relationshiproadblocks.com that basically writes about modern dating from a male perspective. It says that men have 4 beliefs about modern woman wants and thinks in a dating situation.
Women have changed their attitude and approach to dating. Men believe that women now days want the equality with men, but without taking responsibility for it.
Women crave equal pay checks, but, at what price? Women want to make as much money as men, but they still expect men to pay when they go out.
The independent woman conundrum. Women want to have their freedom only when it's convenient to them. They expect their men to be there when they need him.
What happened to femininity? A lot of men feel that women aren't acting like women anymore. Women has lost their softer and femininity. They have become uncompromising and calculating 21st century counterpart.
What do you think? Is it true? Hmmm from my opinion as a woman, I feel it's kinda offensive towards women. Personally I don't see myself the same, though I have to admit that some women are changing to become like that. Basically it depends on each woman's belief and point of view because what they do will based on her life's principle.
I think for no 1 women just want her partner to respect her and treat her nicely. However, men always as the head of the relationship so he still has to bear the responsibility.
For equal pay checks, I don't think it's wrong for women to have ambition to earn as much as men. If women have the same skills and do the job as good as men, I think it's a fair thing to pay them the same. On the other hand, about expecting men to pay on dating, I don't think all women expect that, except if she has a rich guy.
Next is about being independent. I believe although a woman is really independent, she still needs a man to comfort and protect her, because that's the way God design man and woman, to be in need and helpful for each other. If a woman wants a freedom when it's convinient to her, maybe she is just a selfish girl, so you cannot pick her to be the representative of all women.
Lastly is about femininity. I think this is related with being equal with men. Maybe some women just forget to balance out their equality with her nature to be feminime and subbmisive to men. However, I know for sure that there are still a lot of women who know how to balance out.
What is love? Maybe you should ask Seal. The singer of Kiss from A Rose is starting to date Heidi Klum, an international top model since she was pregnant her first daughter, Leni. The biologist father of Leni is the Formula One's boss, Flavio Briatore never involved in Leni's life. Although Seal and Heidi have their own child, Henry, Seal always treats Leni as his own daughter.
So sweeeet... maybe that what will you say. In order to accept our couples completely, surely we need a deep understanding about the real concept of love. There are few things you need to consider before you say "I love you", such as:
Who is saying it first?
Now days, woman can also state her feelings to the man she likes. This is better than keeping it to yourself until one day he gets married with other woman. There is nothing wrong to say love first. However, make sure that he has the same feeling. There is nothing more disappointing than realizing that the man who close with you all this time actually don't have special feeling for you. If you not brave enough to say what you feel, it's okay, just give him signals that you likes him.
Are you really love him? Try to remember, is there any friends, family, or yourself, who ever say "I love you" to their couples? Not really. You must be used to say "I love you" because you often hear it from movies, and it sounds so sweet. On the other hand, man also using this magic words to manipulate. For example, when you get upset because of his behavior, he says the words to melt your heart or to prevent you to leave him after you know he has an affair. Often times, people don't realize that they are being manipulative. Therefore, say the words when you really mean it.
Spontaneous or Planned?
The best way to say "I love you" is letting it grow in your heart, and spontaneously say it when you feel so passionate. You can suddenly say it as a surprise, or create a memorable moment. However, indeed, you should think longer when you want to say it for the first time. This will make you unconsiously planned when you should say it. Hmm rather confusing. Maybe spontaneous more exciting.
Is this the right time?
Heart beating because you want to say your feeling sometimes can ruin the situation. If you say it when your relationship is in the air, maybe there will be no problems. In fact, it will make him smile the whole day. However, a lot of men like casual relationship, so the words "I love you" can makes him worried. He might feel you are too fast to say it and he might think that you pressure him to marry you. You can fix what you have said, but he will still remember it.
Is it better to show it or say it?
Actions speak louder than words. A lot of couples, especially men, are not prioritize sweet words. The important thing, he can shows by what he do that he is really love you. If you compare your love to your family, maybe you never said "Love you, pa...", but you surely go home quickly when your father is lonely at home.
Realizing that there is someone who always be there when you need him will have a stronger meaning rather than hearing those theree words. It doesn't mean you have to forbid yourself in saying "I love you", but it will be more meaningful when you show it through your actions.
From my experience, I believe men and women can't be "best friend." If both of them are straight, I think either they are attracted to each other or just one of them who is attracted to the other. Thus, there is still some expectation that is more than a regular friend. Don't take me wrong here, I am not saying that girls can't have friendship with boys and hang out together. I am talking about a real best friend, the one who you count on and be on your side in good and bad times.
I believe there are still some lines that the opposite sex can share as a friend; if not we won't know the difference between best friends (boys-girls) and lovers. Although between them there are no physical touch and flirting, it's not a guarantee that your friendship is not more than a regular friendship because it also show on how you give attention. You can know that something is going on if you care and expect him/her more than any of your other friends.
Therefore, my advise if you really think of him/her nothing more than a friend, you should know the lines and be careful not to go beyond the lines that make your friend to read the wrong signal. On the other hand, if you realize that you like him/her more than a friend don't hesitate to be honest with your feeling and show it. You will never know the outcome, but surely you will regret if you don't give it a try. However, don't take that too extreme in making yourself looked corny and desperate. "Love will find the way if you try."
